It's the easiest when I'm caught
up with work, going out, surrounded by people. But when the night falls, and
things get quiet, and I'm alone again, I feel lost and clueless about what I'm
doing.
There is so much of mixed up feelings
gushed up inside of me. I still can't seem quite recovered and had completely accepted
this as reality. It feels like just a bad nightmare, I wished it was just a bad
nightmare and I can eventually wake up from this and be back in your arms again.
When our relationship was
revealed once again, for the third time, I figured - probably we're really not
meant to be, you know? Or perhaps just a tad bit of wrong timing.
I have a lot to say, a lot I wish
I can pour my emotions out into words. I don't know how to get use to this, I
don't know am I supposed to even get use to this. You had been such a big part
of my life, and having to take that away, I feel like an empty shell, as if a
part of me was taken away. Like bits of sunshine were destroyed.
I honestly don't know what we are
called right now. Friends? Good friends? Best friends? Temporary separation?
Or, like you said, a pause in the story of our lives? I sure wish we can fast
forward to the time when you can call me 'baby' again, or hold me close to your
chest. I sure wish.
It breaks my heart when you said,
"Every 16 will still be special to me." It breaks my heart so much. I
have never, never felt so much of heartache.
I hope we get through this tough
time baby. I don't know what lies ahead of us in the future, whether we would
really be together again or not, I don't know. I don't know if I would really
be the girl that's worth waiting for, I don't know. But know that, you have and
had always been my blessing in disguise. My sunshine spirit stays with you.
Prove them wrong, and come back
to me, please.
